THE FUCKING WEATHER

IT HAS ALMOST BEEN A YEAR?

October 5 9:12PM

Please excuse my inability to get anything done. But I have to crazy things to talk about.

This past weekend The Fucking Weather sponsored a friend’s piece of shit in the 24 hours of LeMons race in Ohio! It was an 89 Toyota MR-2 and lasted six hours before overheating and dying. Regardless, it was pretty awesome.

ALSO. It has almost been a FUCKING year! The 22nd of this month will be The Fucking Weather’s first birthday. Almost a year ago I decided Rochester is too damn cold and why not make a website about it.

Well that’s all I got. I’m going to stop making promises now about being less lazy. I’ll probably always be this lazy. But there will probably be that day where I decide to put all schoolwork aside and do some work on The Fucking Weather (I’ve reached over 3,000 comments since it was created!) But until then keep sending me comments about how I should be less lazy.

Holy shit, who hired me?

August 4 9:10PM

Hey guys, sorry I'm a lazy asshole. I've been working full time and enjoying my summer vacation before heading back to college. I have plans this year for gadgets (I aim for iGoogle, BlackBerry, Vista Sidebar, and if I obtain one, iPhone/iTouch). I also hope (oh look at me making promises to the Internet again, how many times can I disappoint 10k+ people?) to provide some cheap, simple and vulgar XML service to people don't have to screen scrape to make TFW applications. I just have to look into the legal issues with this before passing information around like the town bicycle. But yeah, I have good intentions for the future, which will emerge when it’s cold outside, I’m bored, and have a big project due in a ridiculously short amount of time. Until then, I hope everyone still enjoys The Fucking Weather 8-)

Calling all tree huggers!

June 29 8:12PM

Someone commented and suggested an earth-friendly fucking weather. I thought it was funny so here you go.

Earth-friendly fucking weather

What do gay horses that like other horses of the same sex (but that's okay because whatever sex a horse likes doesn't matter to anyone else but that horse and if they want to get married no one should be against that) eat?! HAY!

June?! HOLY SHIT 1 3:34PM

I got a day off from work today due to the wonderful flawless software created by a certain company that kinda dominates the world.

But besides that! I've decided to do a lot of fucking-weather-work today, which included (not that anyone really cares except people screen-scraping me (which is cool as long as you tell me)) changing the document type of my pages to XHTML 1.1, because that's the way of the future! *Pushes-up glasses* (I don't actually have glasses). That also included changes that are intended to allow mobile devices display my shit less like shit. So please tell me how that works out for evereyone, and of course bitch your heart out to the ol' commentbox the problems you have.

I do still exist!

May 31 4:50PM

Where the hell did you go? You fell off the face of the internet! Jesus, I check your blog and your fucking output every other day and I\'ve been nothing but disappointed to find nothing has changed. You have a responsibility to us, TFW guy. (WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR NAME?!?!) Anyway, step up to the plate and entertain us god dammit.

Hey man, I still exist. I'm just busy as hell. I do plan on updating the fucking output (which, I have just reached over 2,000 comments since its creation) soon. I've been doing small stuff here and there for more exciting things in the future- I'll get to it. Why you've been checking the fucking output I'm not sure, I haven't had time to update that in months. Maybe this week? (Shit, it's probably a bad idea to make promises to the internet).

Check stuff by the end of the week and then yell at me again. Oh, and my name is a mystery.

I can has your fucking babies now please? We can fucking fuck all fucking night long!

Yeah? Send a link to your picture and a small biography to the fucking-comment box, we'll talk later. ;)

Oh boy!

May 13 8:39AM UPDATED May 14 6:32PM

Apparently I'm this weeks topic on http://failness.com/

UPDATE Woo! Made it on another front page:
http://www.sticks-and-stones-magazine.co.uk/blog/

Other people who have time on their hands!

May 8 12:48PM

I guess I'm not the only one who gets bored and writes code that'll be kinda funny and/or awesome. A commenter this week sent me a link to a Bash script this week that effectively makes a command for retrieving the fucking weather! So if you run Linux or have some other access to a Bash command-line, get yours here:

http://github.com/xintron/fuweather/tree/master

As for other fuckingweather-business, I'm still busy as hell, but I'm done in two weeks (shout-out to all other RIT people who've been commenting 8-)). So look out in a few weeks for more fucking-output (I'm behind some one thousand comments) and yeah.

One last thing- the fucking weather is finally looking good here!

The fucking admin- what?

April 27 10:02AM

I love my fucking-fans. I've been getting some awesome comments every single day, every day. I'm still here, doing some small things in the background but mostly I'm getting pounded with work to do. So because of this, I don't get a lot of time to work on the site. HOWEVER. When summer comes I promise to get back into the site, updating the fucking output (up to 1,500 comments!) and making improvements to the site.

Love,
Your fucking admin.

It's back and better than ever! (Not really.)

April 2 10:13AM

Location Detection is back!

It’s not perfect, but if it’s your first time visiting the site it will attempt to detect your location (again). I found another service that is decently accurate and will certainly-probably be more accurate than going with Rochester, NY. Unless of course it can’t figure it out, then it’ll still say that- but whatever.

Enjoy!

Oh P.s. I'm still loving the amount of people who think they're enlightening about the proper uses of apostrophes. I'm going to create a hit counter, because so far it's at least two a day.

Well that was fun.

March 21 3:01AM

Apparently all of the UK heard about my site, realized it doesn’t work very well over there and decided to comment/complain the hell out of me to get my shit together. Well it’s currently 3 AM in my portion of the US and I think I found all of my shit, and it is seemingly together.

I’ve now incorporated two different weather services that should now work together to figure out your fucking weather. This means if it worked before and now it doesn’t, it should work again. Maybe. I tested the hell out of it so now it’s your turn. Complain away if I broke more shit.

UNRELATED NEWS. People keep taking a shot in the dark asking if I’m at RIT. Yup.

MORE UNRELATED NEWS. This page is getting long, now I have to figure out a plan to make it not-so-long.

RELATED NEWS. Thanks for your donations, feedback, comments, complaints, hatemail, lovemail, sexual offerings, and other related communicational-mischief. I now check for new comments every time I don’t feel like doing work. Thank you, Internet!

P.s. I’ll get back to answering comments sometime soon, I hear you people like that sort of thing.

P.s.s. Dear People who don't read this: I know I'm missing an apostrophe.

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!

March 17 10:54PM

People keep telling me that some places use to work and now they don't. Others tell me places that didn't use to work, work now.

SOLUTION?

I'm going to find a way to attempt to get the weather data from another place if one place fails, hopefully increasing the amount of areas the fucking weather works.

Guess what else! People keep telling me to make gadgets and other fancy things. So I'm working on those, starting with a Windows Sidebar gadget because those are easy.

Thanks for all your input and comments, I absolutely still read and enjoy them. Honestly, I haven't updated the fucking output page because there's too many comments to place in that small space, so I have to figure out a new design for it.

Ta ta for now fucking-weather lovers. But before you go: Become a fan on facebook!

I STILL EXIST

March 10 12:54PM

So I’ve been really busy. Busy includes finishing finals, going on spring break and starting classes again. But fear not! I am back to work on the fucking weather. I’m going to aim to have an iphone/itouch friendlier version up by the end of the week for those who have been commenting about it.

And I’ll do some other cool things too.

"It don't work" doesn't really help.

February 26 3:13PM

Guys, If something doesn't work. Tell me what and why it doesn't work.

I've had 20 "it worked and now it doesn't" comments without at all telling me what or why. Everything I've tested works great.

Also, to the person who said it doesn't work in Safari, you're lying.

My ass hurts.

February 25 1:19AM

I’ve probably spent the past 14 hours in the last 24 working on this site, since Google still hates me. I’ve fixed and improved several things since the switch, so once again keep telling me how things are going. Hopefully non-US and typed cities are working again. Thanks for all of your support, and because of all of your support, fuck ads! (Besides the one on the bottom, she’s cool.)

Many have suggested “why not more sayings? Like, it’s fucking windy! It’s fucking storming!” So congratulations people, you’re some effective persuaders. You all should start seeing a few more additions to your fucking weather. Unfortunately the fucking forecast has been reduced because that’s actually all the information I get now, but instead weather conditions like “storming, raining, snowing, windy” are much improved.

I spent a portion of today searching my town for a copy of New York Magazine so I could find the 2x1 inch reference to my site. I failed to find a copy but some friends hooked me up. Slightly ironic that you can’t find a copy of New York Magazine in a town in New York.

Soooo I’m going to sleep. And go outside. Actually, fuck that, it’s cold.

WTF HAPPENDED?

February 24 3:HOLY SHIT IT'S LATE

A lot of things happened today. It figures the day my site makes it into NY Magazine, the service I used banned my server’s IP for “automated querying”. Well I thought that was the point of a Weather API. If you haven’t guessed it yet that service was indeed Google’s undocumented, unsupported Weather API. And I’m pretty sure it got banned for one of three reasons:

1. They realized “hey this jerk is using our stuff and making it really funny! Let’s ban him.”
2. They’re unhappy that every single time there’s a hit, the weather API gets queried and decided it happens too much.
3. I recently set it up so all errors get emailed to me, which means many bulk emails went to the same place and probably triggered some sort of automated banning function.
I’m thinking idea 3 happened, but regardless it made me sad. Being afraid to disappoint, I found another service that’s entirely unrelated, disabled error-emailing and stayed up all night getting it in a decently working function so I can sleep and not get hate-“WHERES THE FUCKING WEATHER?”-mail anymore. Oh. And if there were any comments after 2PM until 12AM EST sent, they’re lost in oblivion. It took me a while to realize that ALL emailing was being entirely ignored.

As for being reference in NY Magazine, I’m rather shocked. How this (awesome) joke has come this far is beyond me. You can view the reference at http://nymag.com/arts/all/approvalmatrix/54309/.

As for tomorrow, I have a lot of work to do to make this better and hopefully avoid agonizing service issues in the future.

Thanks for all your support.

Ooops

February 23 3:08AM

Sorry about that little outage. The server's IP got banned for "automatic querying detected". I thought that was the point of a weather API.

Anyone, I'm more interested about this:

"New York magazine is right: your site is brilliant. It's the funniest site and attitude I've come across in a long time. Have you considered donations instead of even minimal advertising? I'd be glad to subscribe.

Hilarious. Laugh-out-loud funny. Repeatedly"

New York WHAT? Does anyone have any more information about this? Please send me a comment!

Lessons learned.

February 23 11:05AM

It probably seems like I dropped off the face of the earth last week. That’s mostly because I did, being that this is the end of our quarter. I did do some work on thefuckingweather, but it was behind the scenes-like things that no one would notice. I’ll have more time to do things this week so it’s possible exciting things may happen. I was made aware that alright really IS a word. So suck it English-jerks that don’t actually know what they’re talking about! But of course I’m still getting painful amounts of “you need a fucking apostrophe” comments from people that don’t read this. I think I’ll continue being a ‘literate-fuck’ and ignore my need for non-possession-showing apostrophes. I do commend the one person who commented that I need an apostrophe, read the blog and commented back that he was now aware it’s intentional. I do have to figure out another solution to the “MY FUCKING OUTPUT” page, since I have received way more comments that I originally anticipated.

In other news, it’s amazing to me the generosity of some people. Just saying, there are some damn nice people in the world.

Disturbed was in town this weekend, and I’m pretty sure none of those generous people were there. I witnessed some pretty ridiculous things at that show. This included such wonder as the guy a few people ahead in line, waiting out in the fucking cold already entirely drunk and belligerent. Some other kid is going down the line asking if anyone has a spare ticket they’d like to sell. Drunk-asshole then determined it was a fantastic time to broadcast his amazing wit. He leans out of the line, pulling his sleeves up on his arms, getting ready to flex as if he’s about to throw the ol’ “I have tickets to the gun show” joke. Instead Captain Witty, of the space ship ‘too-damn-drunk’ said “YEAH I DO. TICKETS TO THE FUCK-OFF SHOW”. (Fuck-off show? Really? I’ve never seen it, had no idea they were in town). The kid comes back saying “what?” and drunk-asshole attempts to say his comedic-gold again, but instead it was lost in a fog of slurring. Needless to say, I saw drunk-asshole get thrown out of the concert before Disturbed came on, good job dude. Another fantastic thing I witnessed was in-between the beginning bands and Disturbed. At this point there’s absolutely nowhere to comfortably stand, so we’re all stuck towards the front near the stage with everyone’s back-sweat rubbing on another. While we’re also so tightly packed, there always has to be that guy(s) that will plow through everyone to get to the stage. I’m looking towards the direction of this girl behind me while such a guy is being that guy. I’ve never seen someone’s face go from happy and smiling to utterly shocked so quick, when all of a sudden she punched this dude in the face and yelled “DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME.” Apparently he had squeezed her thigh as he was plowing through people. Despite a little more words being exchanged after that, he pretty much took it and continued on towards the stage with a much more tender face.

However! Besides stupid people being stupid, it was an awesome concert.

ITS FUCKING MONDAY [sic].

February 17 12:36AM

Hey I’m way too backed up in comments and I don’t want to wait to answer these on the my fucking output page, so I’m going to throw these on here.

02/16/2009 - 08:03AM
Hey: I noticed you changed the tag to indicate whether it’s fucking raining or not. Whooptie-fucking-do, job well done, asshole. I hope I wasn't the only one who fucking noticed.

I’ll just make an ass out of you and me and assume you've done the same for snowing, sleeting, sunny, mostly cloudy, partly cloudy, mosty cloudy, foggy, and raining just ever so slightly so that if you're fucking stupid enough to turn on your god damn windshield wipers all they'll fucking do is smear the six-month old bug guts around so that your entire windshield is covered in so much shit you can't fucking see. (That last one might be a bit much, but you see where I'm fucking going.)

P.S. You illiterate fuck: As I should have mentioned yesterday ‘Alright’ is not a fucking word. It’s two fucking words: ‘All Right.’ Like I learned in fucking junior high English class: ‘All right’ is two fucking words just the same as ‘All wrong’ is two fucking words. Of course if you want to sound like a fucking asshole, you could use the urban variant ‘Aight’ but that won’t work unless you’re a black guy who time travelled here from 2005.

P.P.S. Craigslist called and he wants his late 90’s minimalist design back.

P.P.P.S. I just fucking love postscipts, don’t you?

P.P.P.P.S. You fucking rock. This shit rocks. No bullshit, best-site-ever, fucking really. Really: I fucking mean it. I know you must do this out of love and I look forward to when you work out all the fucking bugs and streamline everything. Keep up the good work.

-Jed

Actually, there are a few tags for raining, snowing and such and they’ve been on here since October. Not so much sleeting, sunny, mostly cloudy, partly cloudy, “mosty” cloudy, or foggy because I’m not sure if I even get that-detailed of info, plus I’d have to come up with fucking awesome things to say for each.

P.S. You and 400 hundreds people have already pointed out “Alright” isn’t a word and I purposely left out apostrophes. It’s the fucking weather dude, not a fucking English class.

P.P.S. The 90’s called me as well, they told me they’re doing well. Oh, and your mother said my minimalist design is fantastic.

P.P.P.P.S. Thanks! (Shit. Too many Ps (DO I NEED AN APOSTROPHE HERE?)). But yeah, Thanks dude. And just kidding about your mother, she’s a very fine woman.

02/16/2009 - 11:10AM
I FUCKING FAPPED TO YOUR SITE

HOW? WHY?

02/16/2009 - 03:37PM
This totally fucking rocks, and it works fucking awesome for Australia. Ripper, mate!

I respect that you’ve rejected the apostrophe consistently. Downright Shavian of you.

I’m not sure what much of that Australian-lingo means, but thanks a lot.

02/16/2009 - 05:09PM
Minus 1 Celsius isn’t all that fucking cold for Quebec City in February-- that’s when we all wander around with our coats open and not wearing hats!

Great site, though! I think this is how all weather should be done.

(Also, do you have a thing against apostrophes?)

Sigh.

02/16/2009 - 06:29PM
Hey,

When I try Montreal, QC, i get a \"Invalid character1\" error. It could be because there is an accent on the e in montreal.

Besides that, This website rocks.

Keep up the good work,

Stephen

Thanks! I’ve actually run into this before, and after class today decided to tackle it. I think I’ve solved it but I’m sure more errors are to be found. Tell me how that works out for you.

02/16/2009 - 07:43PM
PRETTY FUCKING AWESOME. HI FROM SOUTH DAKOTA.

THANKS. HI FROM ROCHESTER, NY.

02/16/2009 - 09:49PM
THIS IS THE BEST AND ONLY WAY TO FUCKING GET THE FUCKING WEATHER! THIS SHIT ROCKS!

02/16/2009 - 09:56PM
Who the hell are you? You’re hilarious.

Why, I’m your local-fucking-weatherman. That’s probably not at all local.

That’s the comments I didn’t feel like waiting to answer. I’m behind roughly 300. I plan on tackling those and adding some new features in the near future.

Happy fucking Valentines day! Guess what I got you.

February 14 6:52PM

I’ve done some playing around, and I’m slightly confident that I’ve added a good-deal of rest-of-the-world support. If you zip code doesn’t work, try entering your city and state. I tested a shit-ton of Canadian and European cities. Some that I know work:

Helsinki, Southern Finland
Brighton, UK
Burgos, Spain
Calgary, AB
Enderby, BC

So yeah. 90% of what I tested work fine but I’m sure I’ll still get comments on how the lost city of Canada that no one has ever heard of that’s so fucking cold they cry ice cubes, still doesn’t work.
Enjoy!

Hello World!

February 13 10:16PM

I can’t at all keep up with the number of comments I’ve been getting, but I’m trying. School was crazy this week so not much updating got done except for some minor tweaks. I’m working on fixing cookie problems in Internet Explorer as well as looking into different services to use. Hopefully good things are to come.

The little server that could, the little router that couldn’t.

February 10 12:52AM

Congratulations world, you caused so much traffic on my little router that it flat out ignored all requests made by my computer, and made it entirely unusable. I had to use a friend’s web access today as the entire world (over 60 thousand visitors today (yesterday?)) enjoyed some fucking weather, killing it a few times today.

And because of this, I have purchased some hosting and moved the site over to a more dedicated connection, hoping to give all of you a less-buggy experience. Don’t hate me if I sell out for minimal ad-space to pay for it all, I still want to have my painfully-simple interface that’s nothing but to-the-point weather, without all the other bullshit.

Keep giving me your input. Except for all the places that don’t work- that can’t be fixed until I find another service.

Enjoy, fucking-weather lovers.

Things I have recently accomplished.

February 9 3:16PM

Things I have recently accomplished.

Canada and everyone not in the US: Shit still won’t work. It’s because of where I get the weather data from. It’ll be like that until I can waste an entire day finding another source and changing things to work with their data.

Celsius: Forecast is now in Celsius too! Who knew that was a feature? Though it’s still not 100% because it takes two tries to switch back to Fahrenheit, it’s better than it was. I’m working on it.

I improved the method of obtaining the data, so hopefully we’ll see less of typing in a California zip code and getting New York…

I’m still not adding apostrophes.

Once I can waste another day, I’m going to re-implement automatically determining weather based on IP. Before this got popular it worked (pretty well, too), however the service I used to do it is dead.

Thanks for all of your compliments (and complaints (Canada)).

Thirty thousand visitors strong…

HOLY SHIT COMPLAINTS..

February 9 1:02PM

I guess I should address a bunch of complaints I keep getting.

“IT DOESN’T FUCKING WORK”
My server is getting absolutely pounded. I’m sorry.

“I HAVE TO CLICK CELSIUS FUCKING TWICE TO GET IT TO WORK”
I know. I’m working on it.

“MY FUCKING WEATHER IS IN CELSIUS AND MY FUCKING FORECAST IS NOT”
I know. I’m working on it.

“CANADA DOESN’T FUCKING WORK. IN FACT, NOTHING OUTSIDE THE US WORKS.”
I know. I’m working on it.

“ADD A FUCKING APASTROPHE TO “ITS FUCKING COLD””
No. The fucking weather doesn’t like grammar.

“IT DOESN’T REMEMBER MY FUCKING WEATHER”
Enable your browser to accept cookies. Or just accept my cookies.

“I KEEP GETTING ERRORS LIKE INVALID DOCUMENT CHAR”
Yeah- that happens when two requests happen at the same time and strange things happen and basically there’s a shit-ton of traffic.

So yeah. I'll work on those.

If you bitch about it, it will come.

February 7 8:37PM

I’ve been getting immense amounts complaints that I used Fahrenheit with no option for Celsius. So here you go, fucking-weather lovers, here’s your fucking Celsius. The site has still been getting ridiculous amounts of traffic, since collegehumor.com found it. As of writing I have received over 21,000 unique visitors! People have been giving me some awesome input and ideas so once I get some time to slam my head on my desk until something awesome happens, I’ll get to all of those.

WHOA - WTF?

February 4 9:44AM

So I for one, can’t believe the popularity my ridiculous website has received. Starting February 2nd, at 10 AM this site got over seven thousand hits in one hour. This site hasn’t even SEEN seven thousand hits since it was even created. No seriously, since November it only received 7,349 hits combined, imagine my amazement when it hit 35,000 before the day was over. Before that day the only hits this site got were from friends and family, smirking and saying “So this is what you do at college?” So what the hell happened? I had been bored over the weekend and randomly decided to submit it to i-am-bored.com, who apparently also thought this site was awesome and plastered it on the front page. Kind of surprised that worked since it had already been submitted to other websites, including digg.com, which only received 1 digg (me).

I literally started this site as a joke. One day a friend and I were walking home from a class we had at night, and as always we’re cursing the entire way – “ITS FUCKING COLD”. It then pops in my head “HA- what if there was a website that was as simple as that? Just tells you what the fucking weather is. We don’t need that other bullshit, just tell me if it’s fucking nice or fucking freezing.” Laughter was exchanged, and afterwards for giggles I checked the availability of thefuckingweather.com. WIDE OPEN! And just for the sake of receiving “I CANT BELIEVE YOU ACTUALLY DID THAT”s, I bought it and slapped a big static page saying “ITS FUCKING COLD.” Just for more giggles (and because I was bored over vacation) I decided to make the page functional so it actually told people what their fucking weather is. The simplistic design of the site is based on the genius design of http://isittuesday.com. I envy your creative-genius, sir.

If anyone wonders or cares, this server is an old, sad 550mhz Pentium 3. I found it in the trash and decided to play with it, learn some things about Linux. It has 512 MB of RAM and contains 5 small hard drives from other computers found in the trash. It would have 6 but the power supply doesn’t have that many outputs. To make me feel less-bad about sucking power all the time leaving a computer on, this server runs Folding @ Home so I can feel like I’m doing something for the world (besides telling people to wear a fucking jacking or put some fucking shorts on). I think it has folded some 130-ish proteins in its lifetime.

So yeah, that’s my story. Maybe I’ll write more on this if more ridiculous things happen.

	I think I'll add this for giggles. The internet has already proven to be an interesting place, maybe there are people out there who want to donate to a strange website so they can pay for college.
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